What is LOVE?

I’m in the classroom again, and yet I’m not. My classroom is my every-day. I am in my paradise, where I’m forever the student and forever the teacher … after all, don’t we learn from each-other’s shared experiences?

In this Grad School of Life, I have to find the answers to my own questions, as I fight the shadows of darkness. So I asked the Universe for the definition of love, and I’ve been flooded with input.

I’ve come to realize we don’t all have the same definition for the word, LOVE. That point of miscommunication really disturbs me. Why can’t we all have the same definition for the same word? How many tears would have been spared if the definition had been the same for all concerned?

Ancient Greek philosophers identified five forms of love:

  1. Storge _ familial love,
  2. Philia _ friendly love or platonic love,
  3. Xenia _ guest love,
  4. Agape _ Divine love,
  5. and Eros _ romantic or physical love (implies a loss of control).

hmmm…… One of these things is not like the other …

Romantic Love is an oxymoron — it is neither romantic nor love. It is sexual and it implies a loss of self-control. Eros was considered dangerous, as it catches us at our most vulnerable. Even the Greeks did not aspire to that. It is represented in our common memory by a cherub with a bow and arrow (Ero) — once you’ve been hit by one of Cupid’s Eros (arrows), you fall in love.

Really? wouldn’t that imply that the victim of the cherub falls out of control when struck? Does that sound like something our Father would do to us? Nah, it sounds more like something THE ENEMY would force on us, while making us believe it’s what we wanted all along.

How about we define Love the same, regardless of whether it’s being used,

  • by a three-year-old who loves her puppy,
  • a 60-year-old who loves her grandchildren, or
  • a wife who loves her husband through the later years where love is not defined by a physical activity.

According to Wikipedia, and others, Love is a range of strong emotions. It is also considered to be a virtue of humankind-ness. But somewhere along the definitions, a switch jumps in and, suddenly, love is about desire, as in the song Paradise By The Dashboard Light, by Meatloaf.

“then the feeling came upon me like a tidal wave.”

That reference is NOT what I mean when I say “I love you.” The love I feel is not something that “suddenly” comes upon me, like lust. The Compassion I feel for others is not a sexual passion, but that’s another discussion point. They’ve taken our words and played games with them; convoluted them.

Passion, etymologically, directly refers to Christ’s physical suffering on the cross. Even compassion is not what we think it is — etymologically, it directly refers to “feelings of sorrow excited by the sufferings of another.”

Maybe we can find a better way to do this.

I am reminded of Popeye, Olive Oil, Wimpy, and Bluto.

Olive Oil and her Popeye are like the Wonder Twins when they are together — a protective, symbiotic love where the two are better than the one alone.

Bluto’s love for Olive Oil, however, is one-sided — purely overpowering, manic, and sexual. Not my definition of Love.

Wimpy’s love for Hamburgers is another way we have confused the word. His love for hamburgers is passionate, yet non-sexual. It is still, however, possessive and manic _ The mirror image of Bluto, in a way.

I believe LOVE is a word of inclusion, not confusion. It is a word that means “I want the best for you as I want the best for me, I honor and respect you, and I will never try to change who you are….”

The fact that this world has taken LoVe and turned it into something we can’t fully define when speaking to a three-year-old, is a W(hi)RLD where I don’t want to live. I want to live in a world that furthers the ideal of Life (LOVE) and decides its definition is something we can discuss in front of family audiences. The love I feel for you should be a fractal of the love the Father of All feels for us.

“If I can’t define love in front of a child,
_ that’s not the love I want to discuss.
Love comes from life, Love promotes life.”

___ me, flustered by this blog attempt a few hours ago.

So, what is my definition of LOVE?

I believe Love is what I feel when I want the best life for that other person, just as you would want the best for yourself. Love promotes Life.

As Christ put it,

“You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the Great and First Commandment. And a second is like it. You shall love your neighbor as yourself. On these two commandments, depend all the Law and the Prophets.” Matthew 22:35-40

Neither of these commandments describes a situation where the one is physical with the other. Neither of these implies a complete, physical subjugation to another’s desires.

In fact, Love is more a noun than an action-verb. It is a shared emotion. Not a physical act. There’s a word for the physical act. That word is not LOVE. Making love is a euphemism, not a direct definition. It represents the man-made “perfect idea” of physical love, but the definition is not conclusive, because everyone has their own idea of perfect love.

I suggest we return to our dictionaries and find a proper definition for important words.

When I think of love, I think of the boundless love our Father, the Creator, has for us, His Creation. That would be Agape. He would want us to be happy and fulfilled in Life. He would Inspire in us an overwhelming feeling of acceptance and support.

There is really no other definition than the definition that promotes LIFE.
I will support you in your Life, without judgment or limits. Without the inclusion of confusion. Without their perversion of Christ’s suffering in His Passion, which He undertook because of His Love for us.

To tell the truth, I didn’t think this blog would be so difficult to write. I hadn’t expected the conclusions I’ve reached. Our language has been destroyed — it has been babbled by confusion, and we have innocently allowed it because we haven’t understood the motives of those who confuse us.

Once we understand what LOVE really means, the enemy will have no power over us. After all, #Love WILL Win!

I believe human Love is our attempt at finding the AGAPE Christ and our Creator have for us. Anything else is a poor substitute.

Namaste, my friends.

The Dragonfly’s Student



  1. Great post. There are 8 types of love according to the greeks. Falling in or out of love is one of the strongest emotions that people can experience. Love can be kind. Love can be cruel. Love is everything. Love has been called “one of the most studied and least understood areas in psychology.” Everyone has experienced feelings of love to some extent or another. There are those who found love then lost it, those who found it and kept it and those who are seeking it in odd places. There are also those who don’t know they have it, not realizing it is closer than they think. I wrote an article on my website titled “8 flavours of love – Which one are you? abouthttps://authorjoannereed.net/lets-talk-about-love-8-flavors-of-love/ – Check it out

    Liked by 1 person

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